To Thine Own Self Be True

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Shakespeare may have been the first to immortalize that line, but throughout history and until the end of time, people have struggled and will struggle with this one.

I have never fit it..and most of my life, that was a hurt that wouldn’t go away.  Sure, I tried to fit in (wearing leg warmers -Yes, I admit it – don’t judge, it was the 80’s,  watching NASCAR for a boy that I liked – I’ll never forgive myself for that one) and drinking Boones Farm Strawberry behind the American Legion), but I always seemed to fall short. I hovered around the fringe of fitting in.  I was a cheerleader, so, by association, my “crowd” was the “in crowd”..but while I was with that crowd, I never developed true friendships with those in that crowd.   I never exactly fit in.

We, as humans, try to conform and not stand out.  We wear what the “experts” say is in style and  go to the places that the “in crowd” goes to.

It wasn’t until fairly recently that I’ve allowed myself to be me.  I’ve learned the hard way that trying to fit in is a slow death to self. Why do I want to be like six million other women when God made me perfect the way I am?  I don’t mean perfect as in beach body, never makes mistakes and has a Martha Stewart-esque home. I mean perfect as in that’s just the way he created me: unique, silly, muffin-top and big feet.  He created me to be me.  Not to be like anyone else and now, I am OK with that.

  • I sing (loudly) whenever I fee like it despite the cringing of those around me (my oldest son once told me never to sing in the car with the windows open or I might get a ticket for air pollution) – and I’m ok with that
  • I make up songs to sing about everything and even sing to the dogs and cats – and I’m ok with that
  • I sometimes go to Wal-Mart without having taken a shower first which means I sport a hellacious form of  bed head – and I’m ok with that
  • I don’t eat pumpkin pie, ketchup, or any sauces even though people say that makes me “unAmerican” – and I’m ok with that
  • I create art: canvases, art journals, altered things and many of them look like a 1st grader did them – and I’m ok with that
  • Sometimes I dress to the hilt to go to a local dive bar even though it makes me look like a prostitute – and I’m ok with that
  • I forget birthdays and other important things – and I’m ok with that (it doesn’t make me a bad person, just forgetful!)
  • I’m 47 and listen to electronic dance music and other age-inappropriate music – and I’m ok with that
  • I’ve “twerked” at family gatherings – and I’m ok with that
  • I care deeply and often vocally, loudly stand up for people who are treated badly (even once was physically removed from a HS basketball game for telling a few snot-nosed teenagers to cut the crap – I didn’t even have a child on the team)

It’s ok to be who you are. God made you as you for a reason so laugh, sing, dance – even if you are in public (you’ll never see those people again anyway).

To Thine (Mine) Own Self Be True.

To Thine Own Self Be True

 

Until next time..

Sue

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About Irreversibly Moi

I'm a 40-something mom of two amazing almost-grown boys. Life post-divorce, pre doing the whole marriage thing again. I work for myself consulting in Human Resources and run a small manufacturing company that creates wood items and books for the art industry. I love animals (have 3 dogs and 4 cats and feed a myriad of strays on a daily basis). I love Jesus and, after being raised Catholic, was rebabtized as an adult, but we don't hang out as much as we used to (my fault). I started this blog to give me an outlet to express myself, my art, my passions and my opinions - not necessarily in that order.

6 responses »

  1. What an amazing deep down and REAL post! I am NEVER fit in either- not sure I do still and I am okay with that! I take time to play with my kids which means my house it not always clean and I am OKAY with that! I have found that I am okay with a lot of things that others might not feel is “right” With God leading me, I know that everything will be okay!

  2. Love your post! I have never felt like I fit in….not even in the art community because I could never draw or paint a still life, had to redefine art for myself to fit in. I live in a community where most of the women run year round ~ marathons and are 90 lbs. Plastic surgery is the norm as are BMW’s. We moved down here because of the high cost of living in MA but we def don’t fit in! It’s hard to get to the place where you can be accepting of who your are…

  3. It’s amazing! Even the ‘in’ kids never really felt like they belonged while in high school. Thankfully you’ve managed to find yourself. I’ve been reading some of your other blogs too as well as looking at some of your art work. You’re truly talented.

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